Importance of Family

Family is important to all of us. It's what keeps us, well us and the book A Tree Grows in Brooklyn  by Betty Smith and Stone Soup by Barbara Kingsolver illustrate it very well. The function of family is to keep you sane. To hold you up when there is no one there and help you through life decisions. They are the ones that put you first and keep you on your feet. My family is my backbone, I don't know what I would do if they weren't here.

In Stone Soup, Barbara Kingsolver talks about her idea of having a perfect family, "I started out like any child, intent on being the Family of Dolls" (Kingsolver 10). My family isn't perfect but I love them unconditionally. It doesn't matter how broken the family is, there will always be a strong bond. There is no such thing as a perfect family because no one is perfect. As we get older we start to realize this. When we are younger we always have this image of living in a nice house with your flawless family but its not even close to the truth. Our families fight all the time, whether you like to admit it or not. We sometimes see our parents fight as Barbara Kingsolver says, "every happily married couple I know has loads of irreconcilable differences" (Kingsolver 12). Yeah we have arguments but even at the worst times we know that they love each other. It's okay and healthy to have your own opinion on something.

Your family will always accept who you are and support you. It doesn't matter if your gay, bisexual, divorced, or your 12th marriage, they will never leave your side. If they accept you, you also have to accept them for who they are. In A Tree Grows in Brooklyn it says, "“All of us are what we have to be and everyone lives the kid of life it’s in him to live. You’ve got a good man, Katie.”,“But he drinks.”, “And he always will until he dies. There it is. He drinks. You must take that along with the rest.”" (Smith 102). Sissy tries to explain to Katie that she needs to accept the way Johnny is because that is just Johnny Nolan. Yeah so what, Johnny drinks? You cant change him for yourself. Also in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn Francie says, "he bandaged the arm. The cloth smelled of Johnny, warm and cigarish. But it was a comforting thing to the child. It smelled of protection and love.” (Smith 149). Johnny may not be perfect, but he loves Francie, and that is what truly matters most to her. Francie looks besides the drinking problem and looks at the real Johnny. The one who cares for her and calls her Prima Donna. If you truly love and care for someone, then you can look besides their flaws and mistakes and see the real them and love that.

As I said before, family is what keeps you grounded and makes you feel safe and sound. Family will always be around when the ones that you thought would always be there aren't. Family is loving someone without doubt and with your entire heart. My family is what makes me, me. 

Sacredness of the Ordinary

           The gold ring that never seems to leave my finger was given to me by my grandfather. He had given it to me for my first birthday. He wanted to give me something that I will always remember him by. I never really wore it until now and I never take it off. My grandfather passed away in 2007. He passed away because of a stroke and hypothermia. He had gone out for a walk in the cold October evening with nothing but a shawl. He sat down on the curb to take a break and just passed out. Someone driving by found him 1 1/2  hours later. He could have been saved if someone had found him 10 minutes after he had the stroke, but it was too late. I remember every little bit of it, the police banging on my door, tears, screaming and pain.  We saw ambulances outside, oblivious of the thought of my grandfather being in there. I remember feeling my blood run cold and my heart drop to the floor when the police officer pulled out my grandfather's ID. "Someone found him on the street. We need to rush to the hospital", said the officer. My mom rushed to the ambulance outside and I was left there in shock. I may have been young but I will always have that day embedded in my memory. I will never forget that day. I cried for days, it felt like hell. He passed away on my cousin's birthday. My cousin hates celebrating his birthday because that memory will always be there. He's turning 21 soon, but he has never gotten over it, none of us really have. It seems like it happened maybe 2 years ago but no, its been 8 years. That thought hits me like a truck. Has it really been that long?

         I loved him more than anything and I still do. There's not a single day I don't think about him. I remember playing with him when I was younger. He would take me to the train station and we would just watch them pass by, he'd give me piggyback rides and buy me candy from the convenience store. My mother told me that when I was born, he was beyond happy. I was the only girl born out of his grand kids. She said he held me with such care. I was his prized possession, now this small little ring that he gave me, is mine. The mention of his name still makes my heart crumble a little. I always seem to fiddle with the ring, I rub my fingers against the grooves and think about what life would be like if he was still here. If I ever were to take it off, it would feel like a part of me is missing. I feel odd without it. I keep it on my wedding ring finger, kind of like a promise ring. Some people see it as a flashy ring or something that maybe my nonexistent boyfriend gave me, but no it's not. I don't care for the way it looks, I would still wear it if it was made out of plastic. It's a one of a kind ring just like my grandfather, no one can replace it and no one can replace him.